Luke 17

Jesus said, “If the same person sins against you seven times a day, and turns back to you seven times and says, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive.” (Verse 4)

This verse kind of bothers me. I think it can be used as an excuse to keep for repeated bad behavior.

It is natural that we will sin against other human beings. It’s just part of being broken people in a broken world. It makes sense then that the ones we sin against most often will be the ones that are closest to us, such as our family. It’s not that we intentionally try and hurt the ones we love, but we spend the vast majority of our time with them.

One of the marks of a healthy relationship is the ability to see when you hurt each other, to seek forgiveness, and to give forgiveness. And then learn from your mistakes so that they don’t happen again.

Unfortunately, many relationships are unhealthy. They often include one person repeatedly sinning against the other. Abuse is real and takes many forms: verbal, sexual, and physical. All of them are damaging and sinful.

If you are in an abusive relationship, don’t read this verse and think you need to stay. Jesus is not giving permission to be abusive.

If you are abusing someone else, stop right now! Beg their forgiveness, promise to never do it again and get help.

If you are being abused, get away from the abuser. Get as far away as you can. I know sometimes it is easier said than done, but you were not created to live in fear and pain.

Jesus does want us to forgive each other. That doesn’t mean we have to forget what happened and it doesn’t mean we need to be friends with each other.

Forgiveness is a process. It will not happen overnight.

And the process can start with 500 miles between you and the abuser.